Coping With Stress

By Megan R. Grayson

We have all had this feeling before. Our muscles go tense from it, our bodies feel drained, and our minds go crazy. Yes, the feeling is stress. According to Merriam-Webster.com stress is defined as, "A constraining force or influence as a physical, chemical, or emotional factor that causes bodily or mental tension and may be a factor in disease causation (2011)." As a college student I'm faced with all kinds of different stress. As well, most of you probably witness a little stress in your life too. Having to cope with stress as a student is not uncommon. A recent MSN article reports that the Associated Press conducted research on college student stress at many colleges throughout the United States.

[How To Coping With Stress]

A person suffering from stress can start using the more emotional parts of the brain, shutting down the more logical side of the brain. This has the effect of lowering your intelligence whilst in this state, and effecting our judgment. It can affect performance at work, and our personal relationships.We all have an Ultradian Rhythm, which is a 90-120 minute cycle of stress and relaxation. The relaxation dips are usually around 90 minutes apart. This is when your mind and body is telling you to slow down and relax. Typically you may find yourself daydreaming, which is a natural form of meditation and self hypnosis. Some people instead choose to carry out addictive behavior instead, such as drinking, drugs, and smoking.

This is not healthy because aside from the physical harm such addictions present, there are also psychological problems this can cause. A person cannot learn how to naturally deal with stress if they always turn to their addictions for a release. They do not adequately learn how to cope with the knocks that life inevitably presents. Instead they grow increasingly dependent on their addictions as a means of coping, which often creates many other problems in the long run.

For example, a student who has being suffering financially may take on a part time job in a bar to help pay the rent. This brings a new realm into the student's life; they are meeting new people with different focuses and pastimes. Some of these will be beneficial to the student but there is also the chance that these new people will cause more of a distraction from the students main focus; the degree. Not only this, the job will take over time in the student's life that should be used for socializing, resting or studying.

People often become stressed due to excessive demands of life. Learning time management skills, as well as learning how to say 'no', can really benefit these people.Take a long look at yourself and ask if you are excessively stressed. If you are then take action now. Whilst you are living in this state you are wasting your time here on earth. We are meant to be happy and healthy. You cannot get this time back, so you must act now. Look at areas in life where you can make small, but important changes. It might be reducing overtime at work, taking adequate breaks throughout the day, avoiding certain people or situations, or even getting a new hobby. See the importance in your own stress management, and take action. Your long term happiness and health depend on it.

The workplace is arguably the primary source of stress for most working people. From beating deadlines to dealing with co-workers, stress is part of the normal daily routines on the job. The intensity of stress varies depending on the type of work. Some jobs are innately more stressful than others, especially those that involve danger to life such as combat-related duties.

Young people dealing with the stresses of student life can also be prone to developing eating disorders as a form of coping. Anorexia, Bulimia and over-eating are all ways to exert control of life when everything else seems to be chaotic and out of hand. Again, this will only cause the student further difficulties. It is very hard to overcome eating disorders and the disease has a knock on affect on all areas of the person's life. Eating three meals a day and having a healthy diet is very important for a healthy mind and healthy body.A recent survey of student mental health showed a drastic increase in the amount of students suffering with emotional problems, anxiety and depression. More and more students are seeking counseling for their problems and 10% of those students are suicidal. It seems to be a very dark statistic but it is important to highlight the seriousness of the issue. For many people, student years are the times of their lives, but for those who find it difficult to cope, it can be very very hard.

Many of the debilitating and chronic diseases that plague humans today can be directly attributed to recurring stress reactions. Diabetes mellitus, cardiovascular diseases and cancer are just some of the serious illnesses that could be prevented with the help of stress management.

It is important to make the most of the help that is available to students. There is extra funding available from charities and organizations that many students aren't aware of. For students who struggle with finance and have emotional difficulty there is a lot of help at hand. Student welfare officers, student counseling services and the students union are there to support all sorts of issues.

Stresses and problems aside, university life is over all very rewarding and very worthwhile. Skills learned and friends made at university shape lives and build careers. There are plenty of good times to be had despite the pressures.More advice on student lifestyle can be found on the Student Book website.Student Book is a website for prospective and current students. It offers a university comparison tool and a wealth of information on the ins and outs of applying to university. The site is also a guide to student life with advice on finance, welfare, study skills, accommodation and a lot more. These are helpful, relevant and entertaining articles aimed at students and future students.

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Is Stress a Choice? Or a Habit?

By Lynette Crane

We often say that stress isn't just something that happens to you, it's a choice you make about how to react to what happens to you. In a sense this is true, but it is an unconscious choice. You're not only unaware that you're making a choice, but even that there are any other options.

"Stress Makes You Stupid" is my rallying cry; when confronted with what your personal brain has labeled as "danger" you do what security experts have often noted is the first response when threatened: you freeze. Not just the body, but the brain freezes. With the freeze, accompanied by an urgent need to do something, you take the well-worn path that is a habit. It's so easy.

Habits are sequences of behavior that are set up to make life easier; if you had to pause and ponder over what to do at a every little choice-point in life - Let's see, shall I put on my pants left leg first or right leg first? Brush my teeth or bring in that cat before bedtime? - you'd never get through the day, much less accomplish anything of value.

Habits make life so easy that they start to enslave us - just like the flies in a story related by Deepak Chopra, who, when the jar lid was removed, continued to stay inside the jar.

So when the "danger" sign goes off in the brain, we set off on the well-carved path through that jungle, rather than plunge off into the underbrush in the hopes of finding something better.

Under stress, we develop those habitual coping behaviors as our path: one person may retreat, quietly, while another one blusters and becomes defensive, a third pauses to contemplate the situation with curiosity, wondering what comes next... and so on.

We may have first performed that habitual behavior at an early age; by adulthood it has become so deeply ingrained in us that we see no other choice.

This becomes our "path through the jungle" which blinds us to other options.

A week or so ago I went to a luncheon where the speaker was a security expert who had gained much of her information about how to respond in dangerous situations from her Navy Seal husband. The information she provided involved physically threatening situations, but the wisdom I gleaned from her talk applies equally to the socially threatening situations that are the source of so much of today's stress.

Here are some guidelines:

Plan ahead: Whether you know you are going to be confronted by someone who is abrasive to you, or you are about to enter a situation where you are going to be evaluated, have a plan that doesn't involve your usual response (freeze, fight or flee).

Step 1: Make sure you are rested and well fed before entering the stressful situation. Habits are most powerful when will power (i.e., conscious control of your brain) is low. And that will power is very low when you are sleep-deprived, or have eaten foods that give you instant energy, followed by a let-down.

Step 2: Plan a few things to say that will delay your automatic response, such as asking questions to clarify what is really going on. Your habitual response not only includes your behavior, but your perception of the situation. What if you're wrong?

Here are some examples of a few questions to have in mind when confronted by a situation that presses your stress buttons:

• "How did I... fall short of your expectations?" or "When... ? In what way(s)?"
• "To what extent... ?" (Just like journalism class!)
• "Why did you say that to me?"
• "What do you mean by too quiet?"

One of my personal favorites is this: "Do you believe what you said helps me in some way?"

Use delayers: "You've given me a lot to think about. I'd like to get back to you for a discussion of this."

Always take a deep breath before responding. It really slows down your automatic reaction, and, over time, helps to train your conscious brain to override those habitual impulses.

Practice: You probably have some situations in mind where you felt overwhelmed in the past. Re-enact those scenes mentally, responding differently. Then do actual practice, in privacy. Imagine what is happening, then imagine a more powerful response, one that leaves you feeling calmer and more in charge.

Review and reward: Go over stressful encounters and note if you did something, even a little something, differently from the past. Perhaps you paused and looked thoughtful, instead of becoming defensive. Hooray! Tell yourself you just did something great (you did). Give yourself a treat.

You can't change other people: Or can you? It's amazing how, when you change your own behavior, other people are forced to change. People who once were confrontational may find themselves reluctant to do so, when you stand up, quietly and firmly, for yourself, but without directly attacking them.

Slow down your expectations: There is no magic wand that will turn you, overnight, into a superbly skilled manager of stressful experiences that once overwhelmed you. The danger is that you will interpret your behavior as failure, when in fact you are progressing nicely. Give yourself a chance to move towards a new, powerful, more serene life.

Remember these words of Mark Twain:

Habit is habit, and not to be flung out of the window by any man, but coaxed downstairs a step at a time. ~Mark Twain

Lynette Crane, M.A.(Psychology) and Certified Life Coach, is a Minneapolis-based speaker, writer, and coach. She has more than 30 years' experience in the field of stress management. She currently works to provide stress and time pressure solutions to harried women, those women who seek "Islands of Peace" in their overly-busy lives. Her talks to groups of what she calls "harried women" are receiving rave reviews. Visit her website at http://www.creativelifechanges.com/ to see more in-depth articles and to view her programs.

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